For better, for worse: Malaysian wives taught to be ‘obedient prostitutes’

Photo posted on the Facebook group Obedient Wife Club.
 
According to a newly created club in Malaysia, the secret to a successful marriage is simple: an obedient wife who makes sure her husband is sexually satisfied. Launched on June 4 in Kuala Lumpur, the 1000-member strong ‘Obedient Wives Club’ (OWC) has sparked controversy in one of the most modern and progressive Muslim-majority countries.
 
The new club says is it can cure social ills and curb divorce rates by teaching women to “obey, entertain and serve their husbands”, thus preventing men from straying into sin. It offers marriage counselling and motivation courses to both men and women, with a “focus on wives”.
 
The club was founded by a business company called Global Ikhwan, which has ties to the banned radical Islamist sect Al-Arqam. Both the company and the religious movement were founded by the late controversial cleric Ashaari Mohamed. Most of the OWCs members are also Global Ikhwan employees.
 
Although most politicians and activists in Malaysia have dismissed the OWC as a handful of backwards extremists, some have expressed a degree of sympathy for the club’s ideas. The right-wing UMNO party was forced to publicly distance itself from the club after its n°2 Mohd Nasir Ibrahim, who attended the June 4 launch, was quoted as saying that he supported the view that most social problems had their roots at home.
 
 
A smiling Mohd Nasir Ibrahim (far right) looks on during the Obedient Wives Club launch on June 4, 2011. Photo posted on the Obedient Wives Club Facebook Group.

“Serving your husband like a prostitute is a rewarding effort as a wife”

Aquila, 44, is one of the founding members of the Obedient Wives Club. She studied languages and linguistics in England between 1987 and 1991, and has been an employee of Global Ikhwan for the past ten years.
 
I have been married for 19 years, and my marriage is a very happy one. I am convinced that many marriages face problems or end in divorce because the wife doesn’t know how to fully satisfy her husband. When he comes home from work and is tired or stressed, don’t pester him with questions or your own needs. Smile warmly at him, embrace him. By being a good wife, you are performing God’s will, and you will be rewarded.
 
Marriage, especially long-lasting ones, can fall into routine and become dull for both partners. This is why some men turn towards prostitution – even if they have a good wife, they may need something more exciting. If you serve your husband even better than a prostitute does, by obeying his desires but also being warm and loving, then he will have no need to sin. If you serve your husband like a first-class prostitute, he will give a lot back to you in return. It is a rewarding effort.
 
“God created man above woman, but that does not mean that women do not have an important role to play.”
 
Of course, there may be times that I don’t agree with my husband, or do something that may upset him. In those cases it is important to talk openly and be forgiving. For example, my husband and I were married 13 years before he decided to take a second wife [polygamy is permitted within Malaysia’s Muslim community]. At first I felt angry and hurt, I was afraid he would no longer love me. I confronted my husband, and he asked me: “Do you not love each of your four children equally? It is the same for me. It is not because I take a second wife that I will not love the first.” I was reassured, and now my co-wife is like a rainbow in my home, someone I can share the love and burden of marriage with. [Aquila’s husband and co-wife also work for Global Ikhwan].
 
God created man above woman, but that does not mean that women do not have an important role to play, on the contrary. By maintaining harmony within her household, she is helping maintain harmony within society as a whole.”
 
Extracts of the OWC's launching ceremony on June 4 in Kuala Lumpur. The launch included speeches by members, an awards ceremony, a skit showing a 'disobedient' (and unhappy) wife begging forgiveness of her husband, and a mass wedding recepion for eight couples. Video courtesy of Malaysiakini.tv. 

“The club is insulting and degrading for all Malaysian women”

Matthew Tard Ong, 22, is a Malaysian-born PR student in Australia. He is the founder of a Facebook group called ‘We do not want sexist nonsense from Global Ikhwan’.
 
Although I'm a man and a member of Malaysia’s Buddhist community (and therefore not directly affected by the OWC), I was absolutely revolted when I first read about the club. It is insulting and degrading for all Malaysian women.
 
Assimilating women in general to prostitutes is bad enough, but the most dangerous thing about the club is that it tells women that they are responsible for everything that is wrong in their couple or family. Even if their husband is violent, even if they are victims of abuse, they still have to say yes to everything in the name of ‘obedience’.
 
That’s what pushed me to create a Facebook group denouncing the club, which now has over 4,700 members. I have also teamed up with Malaysia’s white ribbon group against domestic violence. We are lobbying the government for it to review the public statements of the OWC and monitor its activities, to verify that they do not breach Malaysian law on gender equality and women’s rights. We plan to hold a press conference on the symbolic date of Father’s day next weekend, to call on men – and women – to turn their backs on such sexist nonsense.”
Post written with FRANCE 24 journalist Lorena Galliot.

Comments

ALL THANKS TO DR OPHANG

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Society's ills caused by bad wives?

I did not even read the article but I just wonder if people are blaming the problems over there on women. If you have a drought and you blame something unrelated on it, your solution will not solve the drought.

Men get bored with the same kind of women, no matter how artistic she is where these women want to be concerned. A man can even have 20 wives and seek a new one, just out of boredom.

I'm not even concerned that these women are degrading themselves, people find happiness in the oddest ways. It's those looking in from the outside who claim that they are oppressed.

Whatever floats their boat, they should go ahead and do it. For those who do not want to participate, I hope they can have the option not to do this to themselves.

Ok, I just read it and I see tha the lady who founded the club is educated. What goes on in her home will be vastly different from what will go on in a home with lower income and less formal education. Those women are going to be facing a much rougher situation than she is. I don't see how diminishing myself and making myself non existent can help society at large. If a woman becomes unstable like that, absorbing the stress of everyone else in the household, she becomes a ticking timebomb.

I'm not opposed to polygamy, given that I come from such a family. It has it's own set of problems, just as those marriages with only two spouses. I would like to see more of polyandry though. One person cannot fulfil the other person, the burden is too large be to shouldered on one person. One husband, cannot be everything and cannot be enough for one women, leave alone up to four. It works better if there's multiple husbands and multiple wives, for those willing to try that kind of minefield.

Good luck to everyone!

Islam Respects Women as

Islam Respects Women as Equals

The Myth:
The Quran places men and women on equal foundation before Allah. Each person is judged according to his or her own deeds. Women have equal rights under Islamic law.
The Truth:
Merely stating that individuals will be judged as such by Allah does not mean that they have equal rights and roles, or that they are judged by the same standards.
There is no ambiguity in the Quran, the life of Muhammad, or Islamic law as to the inferiority of women to men despite the efforts of modern-day apologists to salvage Western-style feminism from scraps and fragments of verses that have historically held no such progressive interpretation.
After military conquests, Muhammad would dole out captured women as war prizes to his men. In at least one case, he advocated that they be raped in front of their husbands. Captured women were made into sex slaves by the very men who killed their husbands and brothers. There are four Quranic verses in which "Allah" makes clear that a Muslim master has full sexual access to his female slaves, yet there is not one that prohibits rape.
The Quran gives Muslim men permission to beat their wives for disobedience, but nowhere does it command love in marriage. It plainly says that husbands are “a degree above” wives. The Hadith says that women are intellectually inferior, and that they comprise the majority of Hell’s occupants.
Under Islamic law, a man may divorce his wife at his choosing. If he does this twice, then wishes to remarry her, she must first have sex with another man. Men are exempt from such degradations.
Muslim women are not free to marry whom they please, as are Muslim men. Their husband may also bring other wives (and slaves) into the marriage bed. And she must be sexually available to him at any time (as a field ready to be “tilled,” according to the holy book of Islam).
Muslim women do not inherit property in equal portion to males. Their testimony in court is considered to be worth only half that of a man’s. Unlike a man, she must cover her head - and often her face.
If a woman wants to prove that she was raped, then there must be four male witnesses to corroborate her account. Otherwise she can be jailed or stoned to death for confessing to “adultery.”
Given all of this, it is quite a stretch to say that men and women have “equality under Islam” based on obscure theological analogies or comparisons. This is an entirely new ploy that is designed for modern

Take it easy buddy. This

Take it easy buddy. This "Club" is just similar to the groups in mid-west America who their men members marry several young girls, have them pregnant in the name of Jesus. There are these type of groups every where in the wold including the US. We are not any better. We all have dark spots in our history, culture, society, and religious. Look within before you judge. These groups do not represent the majority.

to grill05

the groups in the USA who practice polygamy are in violation of the laws of the USA and are often prosecuted for child abuse and abridgment of civil rights of women. there is simply no comparison between the wholesale acceptance of the abuse and debasement of women and children that exits in even the most "progressive" Muslim country and the isolated and socially condemned cases in any society. you owe your country an apology.

How about an Obedient Men

How about an Obedient Men club?

vVUkQWSNYAD

Great coommn sense here. Wish I'd thought of that.

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If Mrs Aquila and the other 44 founding members of the Obedient Wives Club had devised the perfect recipe for a happy marriage... Why did her husband need a second-wife????... Flaws in the system me thinks...

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